June 9 Results - individual stroke play! 19 turned out!

It was a cold and rainy day!

Say have you not heard this before?

19 brave souls stormed out on to the course and despite the elements they battled their way around to beer and burgers by 1:30!

And as you can see the action was hot and heavy!

Big Weiner of the day with a Low Gross 70

(He shot his age again!)

Was Dapper Dave Barker!

He isn't your average bottom feeder!

His partners in crime were 

Larry (Gee Dave - can I have your autograph?) Sill

Angus (What I didn't win again?) Gouthro 

and John (Sometimes I sits and sometimes I drinks!) Campbell

Playing along as well were Flavio 

(I'm not your average Italian stallion!)Facchin

Rick

(When I grow up I want to hit the ball just like Dave Barker!) 

Baker

And Al ( I might be short but I'm undersized too!) Jakel.

Let the records show that Jakel came in  second low net in the first flight. 

 Just don't let the records be writ large!

This foursome of Ken 

(Two Deuces again John Campbell! Ha! Ha! Ha!) 

Robertson alongside of 

Jack (I missed a putt by how much again ?) Matthews

(He also managed to shoot high but with his handicap took the Low Net for the second flight!)

This charming lady either knows the length of putt you missed Jack or something else - we leave it to your imagination!

The charming Laurel 

( I have to cook Angus his breakfast at 4:00 AM!) Gouthro

and

Gloria 

 ( Ho Hum - outdrove you two guys again!) 

Tewnion!

Bill (Man I hate sand traps!) Brown on the right 

was tied with Robertson for 

second Low nets in the second flight!

Don (I should have stayed in bed! 

Yeah he should have ! He! He! He!) Puhach

and the two charming ladies -

Judy ( Yeah the beast is around here somewhere

- how marriage changes a view of a spouse!) Cross 

and Audrey 

( I should have tied some fishing tackle on some of those shots!) Faulkner.

The ever urbane and charming Frank 

(Culture hell! Just beat them with a 5 Iron!)  Barrett  

managed two deuces as well as tying for Low Net in the first flight.

Rob (Are I not the coolest golfer on the course?) Egan 

Warren (The Beast!) Cross and 

Dave (I still can't believe I hit the ball that bad!) Hampton

They sort of dragged around the course and finally decided to get rid of Warren - somehow he managed to get the rope off his neck though!

Don Puhach managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory and so he was awarded the coveted Token of the Week Award.

HELP! We need everyone signed up 
to make our Seniors Tournament a go!

Here's an African Golf Story! Thanks Dave Hay!

A businessman was attending a conference in Africa .  He had a free day and wanted  to play a round of golf and was directed to a golf course in the nearby jungle.  After a short journey, he arrived at the course and asked the pro if he could get on..

"Sure," said the Pro, "What's your handicap?" Not wanting to admit that he had an 18 handicap, he decided to cut it a bit.
"Well, its 16," said the businessman,
"But what's the relevance since I'll be playing alone?"

"It's very important for us to know," said the pro, who then called a caddy. "Go out with this gentleman," said the pro, "his handicap is 16.."

The businessman was very surprised at this constant reference to his handicap.  The caddy picked up the businessman's bag and a large rifle; again the businessman was surprised but decided to ask no questions.

They arrived on the 1st hole, a par 4. "Please avoid those trees on the left," said the caddy. Needless to say, the businessman duck-hooked his ball into the trees.  He found his ball and was about to  punch it out when he  heard the loud crack of the rifle and a  large snake fell dead from a tree above his head.  The caddy stood next to him with the rifle smoking in his hand. "That's the Black Mamba, the most poisonous snake in all Africa .  You're lucky I was here with you."

After taking a bogey, they moved to the 2nd hole, a par 5. "Avoid those bushes on the right," says the caddy.

Of course, the businessman's ball went straight into the bushes.  As he went to pick up his ball, he heard the loud crack of the caddy's rifle once more, and a huge lion fell dead at his feet.

"I've saved your life again," said the caddy.

The 3rd hole was a par 3 with a lake in front of the green.  The businessman's ball came up just short of the green and rolled back to the edge of the water.  To take a shot, he had to stand with one foot in the lake.  As he was about to swing, a large crocodile emerged from the water and bit off much of his right leg.

As he fell to the ground bleeding and in great pain, he saw the caddy with the rifle propped at his side, looking on unconcernedly.

"Why didn't you kill it?" asked the man incredulously.

"I'm sorry, sir," said the caddy, "this is the 17th handicap hole.  You don't get a shot here."
That's why you should never lie about your handicap!!

June 9 - Looks like ABCD golf!

Well as only 18 hardy (foolish?) souls turned out on the 2nd - Meister Dave Hay allowed them to play regular stroke play - it was cold wet and windy? 

much like the girls we used to date in high school? 

Anyways no great harm was done!

June 9 - random draw before 8:30 and you play as two pairs and the lowest net of each of the pairs is recorded as your team score. So if A nets 4 and B nets 5 and C nets 7 and D nets 8 then the score would be A  for 4 and C for 7 and your team score is 11 for the hole! IF you have a threesome then each player plays D every third hole -

GOT IT! Dummy!?

Remember PLAY THE BALL as it lies - 

no improving your ball placement 

anywhere on the course!

UNLESS THE RULES PROVIDE RELIEF!

Seniors' Golf June 2 8:30 AM Start! Someone wake up Sveistrup as you drive by his place!


Wed, June 2     
8:30 AM Shotgun   


 Come on you know who you are!

AC  BD

Two Low Nets


Random assignment of 4-somes

Assign each player in the group a Letter A, B, C, or D

A and C are partners.  B and D are partners. (For all 18 holes.)

Each player plays their own ball on each hole from tee thru green.

Record all 4 players individual gross scores hole by hole.

As you can see the game gets ugly real quick!

• At bottom section of card, on each hole, record the ONE best low net of the A/C pair PLUS the ONE best low net of the B/D pair using each players handicap strokes. 

If you are playing as a “3-some”, 

each player takes a turn playing the extra ball,

that will be the “D” ball.

And now you know who made up this game!

Gee - Thanks Dave!

UGLY BALL Results from May 26th and yes Craik and Kenyon got out of bed on time today!

Writing this from Iqaluit - on beautiful Baffin Island on the sunny shores of Frobisher Bay! 

Mind you the bloody bay is frozen for 120 km!

Why am I here?

   Alice Brielle Robertson

So after getting Craik and Kenyon out and on the course early 

we managed to scramble 31 golfers out for a round of 

UGLY GOLF!

Weather sunny with cloudy periods, light winds

Turn-out 31…not bad for the first day at 8:30.   

Even Barb and Gord made it…you shamed them into getting up at 8:15. 

(Not bad for some public humiliation! He! He! He!)

Game played: Ugly Ball….similiar to Team coloured ball, but I painted up some old balls with google eyes etc. and we used those.   

Gave Dave Barker a Nike 1 Platinum…

.but it was a black one…

.not easy to see even on the fairways.  

 Dave managed to loose it on 6.  

 The twist on this game is you don’t get DQ’d for loosing the ball…

.just a 3 stroke penalty, 

which obviously was not enough as 

2 of the winning teams lost a ball.

So next time we double the penalty! ?

Winners on the day:

1)    Don Ozubko, Angus Gouthro, Rob Egan and John French  (score 132)

2)    Fred Hammarlund, Jorgen Sveistrup, Al Jakel (score 133)

3)    Rick Baker, Dave Barker, Barb Kenyon, Gord Craik (135)

(that will teach them to get up early!) 
Just to show you that I am not always critical of Dave Barker here is Rick Baker's take on Dave!
By the way,  Dave may have lost the BLACK ugly  ball but he made up for it by driving the 16th green and making a BIRD!  
Great shot I say.
Rick Baker 
 Boy some guys sure want to strut their stuff! He! He! He!
Even he couldn't believe his shot on 16!

4)    Laurel Guthro, Erwin Nyfeler, Ron Haywood, Dave Hay (136)

Deuces:

1)    Don Ozubko (two!)

The old train wrecker does it again!

2)    Jorgen Sveistrup

Master Mechanic

3)    Dave Barker

How did he lose the black ball?

4)    Mark Nadler

Gee that was a good shot wasn't it! Ad nauseum!

Up-dates.

1)    Weldon Steel.   

The team of Jakel, Peace, Baker and Hay braved the snowy, sleety, rainy, cold, miserable, long drive, day to battle Revelstoke last Thursday.  

 Came away cold, wet, and yet, triumphant with a 3 ½ to 2 ½  victory.   

The return match is tomorrow at Eagle Point! 

Good Luck!

2)    Seniors tournament.   

Filling up fast….
we only want 76 golfers, and already have 6, 

so get signed up asap!

 Our tournament will only go ahead if we get about 
40 of our own members signed up!

Jorgen has signed Ken Robertson up while I am in Iqaluit! 
How about you?

3)    Next week will play another team game to be determined by the 

Grand Poobahs 
after considerable thought.

The Grand Poobahs require considerable thought 
as it hurts their little brains!

May 26 Seniors' Golf Time Change - Special Alert to Barb Kenyon and Gordie Craik! Get out of bed!

News Flash.....News Flash.....News Flash.....

GOT YOUR ATTENTION?

Wednesday Seniors May 26th......

....New Start Time is 8:30..

...DON'T BE LATE!!!

The Executive Staff  will decide when good and ready what game we will be playing......

Remember these are the same kind of guys who are cleaning up the Gulf Oil Spill!

Keith Larson sends in a special from Chinook Cove Golf discount

Keith got this from Chinook Cove! save a few bucks!
Well I tried to download it but you will have to go to get your 25% discount coupon!
http://chinookcovegolf.com/

register there and they will send you a pdf file with the info!

May 12 Seniors' Results from Team Play of 1-2-3

There were 47 - count them! - out today and we had a great contingent of ladies - some of whom were lounging around the hot tub when we came in!

And this was fine as the guys were really hot after a tough day on the course!

Well this was all fine but now we have to face the truth!

There were 12 Teams out there and they were really snarling and snapping at each other! Big money was on the line!

In Sixth place with a net score of 129 as a team! 

Don, John, Barry and Bryan. Obviously they haven't figured out how to cheat as well as the others!

They kind of let success go to their heads and sort of let it all slip away!

Then three teams managed to take their shoes and socks off real fast and  they came in tied!

So they got the multi tasking prizes of being 3rd, 4th or some took a fifth!

 Al was supervising Dave as he cleaned out his ear wax!

 Audrey was sure that Bob had a great putz - oops sorry that he made some great putts!

 Holly was supervising the kiddies corner where Cec and John kept messing up!

 They settled right down after she disciplined the two of them  - apparently she sent Fred Persello home early!

Dave, Don and Laurel managed to corral some decent cash!

Mind you Ozubko only manages to shoot 79 when the pressure is off  now if he could only hang on on Men's Night!

Now we are getting to the really big winners!

Del had to drag Jerry around and luckily Ron and Erwin were able to play up and they came in second!

The grand poobahs of golf today were:

Dave, Jim, Ian (looking for his winnings as usual!) and Mark!

They celebrated well and apparently Ian had to deal with security on the way home!

Finally there were three natural deuces today!

Dave Barker

Charlie Larson

Charlie needs every nickel to keep his blood levels right!

Ken Robertson

Not hard to hole the second shot today!

Then there were a whole bunch of loser groups who because they were too honest they didn't win!

Gordie and Barb were so bad their partners left early!

John, Charlie, John and Fred - with French taking two beers at a time in consolation!

Gloria had another tough day as when she drank her partners got blurry! Phil, Dave and Arnie!

Angus wouldn't behave so he got his ear pulled, Warren and Bob behaved!

 Rick, Doug, Audrey and Judy were also amongst the has beens!

 Audrey, Ben and Ken thought they had a real game going and Ben was his real Viking self!

But even pumped like that he couldn't carry us home!

Thanks to Al and Dave for organizing and getting it going - great turn out and we look forward to building on success!

Sign up for the 

June 23 (Wednesday) Eaglepoint Seniors Tournament! 

We need to have about 40 of our members enter to make it work! 

See you on the links and in parting here is a joke that has been making the rounds!

Jon and Betty met while on a singles cruise and Jon fell head over heels for her.  When they discovered they lived in the same city only a few miles apart Jon was ecstatic.  He immediately started asking her out when they got home.

Within a couple of weeks, Jon had taken Betty to dance clubs, restaurants, concerts, movies, and museums.  Jon became convinced that Betty was indeed his soul mate and true love.  Every date seemed better than the last.

On the one-month anniversary of their first dinner on the cruise ship, Jon took Betty to a fine restaurant.  While having cocktails and waiting for their salad, Jon said, "I guess you can tell I'm very much in love with you.  I'd like a little serious talk before our relationship continues to the nextstage.  So, before I get a box out of my jacket and ask you a life changing question, it's only fair to warn you, I'm a total golf nut.  I play golf.  I read about golf.  I watch golf on TV.  In short, I eat, sleep, and breathe golf.  If that's going to be a problem, for us, you'd better say so now!"

Betty took a deep breath and responded, "Jon, that certainly won't be a problem.   I love you as you are and I love golf too; but, since we're being totally honest with each other, you need to know that for about the last five years I've been a hooker."

"Oh wow!  I see," Jon replied.  He looked down at the table, and was quiet for a moment, deep in thought then he added: "You know, it's probably just because you're not keeping your wrists straight when you tee off."

 

Senior Mens' Golf Tournament at Eaglepoint - Wednesday, June 23

Help! We need at least 40 of our own Seniors to register ASAP for our tournament! 
Please commit yourself ASAP!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010 Game on!

The Weatherman says it is going to be smashing on Wednesday!

Here is the program for the day!

1 - 2 - 3

Each player plays his/her own ball from the tee through the green and to the cup!

 On Hole #1 you record the lowest net score of one golfer!

On Hole #2 you record the lowest net score of two of the golfers and on the third hole you record the???? Got it?

Then on Hole #4 you start all over again and if you start on #16 you record 1 net score and on #17 you record 2 net scores and on #18 you record? How many!? 

Oh a fast learner - but how many do you record if you start on 15?

IF you are a threesome each of you plays a second ball on every third hole and we will leave that decision up to you!

Please show up by 8:50 at the latest so the organizers can get to the tee too!
This will be a random draw team game!

OK So this was going to be an adult posting so here it is - I managed to get a shot of a real great hot tub party with some great sets of racks and here they are!

Well aren't they?

May 5 Results!

Shocking! That's the results!

It was too cold for sane people to golf today but there were some groups out there!

Dave Barker and some buddies went out as well as

that woman who thinks she can fish and cut bait at the same time!

She went out with Judy and Warren Cross!

Do you know that when a woman wears a leather dress, a man's heart beats quicker, his throat gets dry, he gets weak in the knees, and he begins to think irrationally???

Ever wonder why?

It's because she smells like a new golf bag ....

Wednesday, May 5, 2010 Seniors 9:00 AM

Seniors' Golf Wednesday at 9:00 AM 

- assume it is going to be regular stroke play 

with random draw 

for golfing partners and tee starts.

Keith 

(I can look them in the eye and never miss a putt!) Larson 

sent in this notice from 

Chinook Cove Golf Course.

 Seniors Tournament

The Senior Men’s Tournament is 

Wednesday
June 16th ( must be 55+ years). 

$50 entry
fee includes 18 hole tournament, 3 handicap
divisions, door and competition prizes 

and a BBQ buffet style dinner.

This is why Audrey Faulkner was not golfing the past few weeks!

Audrey was not golfing regularly this past few weeks - she had other things to occupy her time apparently!

She said the weather was better where she was than what we had here and she even says that she managed to land a 34" bonefish that was 31" long!

You be the judge! Was she fishing or was she practising?